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Monday, April 9, 2012


The latest rumour to swirl around the sales floor here at Kitchens and More is a really, really sick and twisted one. This is perhaps the grossest thing I have ever heard of, and I can only pray that it is not true. I share this  tidbit of slimy trash only because it amazes me how depraved our existence can be. Anyway brace yourselves and here goes : With their significant others out of town on Easter Sunday, Gay John and Shady Greg got together for beer and pizza (this has not been confirmed but certainly sounds believable so far). Alledgedly, around 6 pm with the Sun still blazing brightly and the better part of a case of Sam Adams drained the two perverted Sicko's decided to make a video. A video they could send in to "Americas funniest home videos". One they hoped would win them first prize. I have not seen this video. I am not positive it exists. My sources, however, are impeccable and the two degenerates in question seem likely so... The video suposedly shows Gay John remove his pants, underwear, socks, and shoes and wander outside to sit on the curb. Both Gay and Shady are said to be giggling hysterically, sipping their beers as John begins to lather his dick (yes his dick) with 100% pure honey. He then leans his head back like a sunbathing Satyr leering wildly, moaning loudly as a cute little Pekinese puppy named Fluffy (who's owned by a 7 year old Jerrys kid) licks the honey off of him and Shady yells "Stay in the frame!". Apparently this continues until Gay John yells "Heel" and, ironically enough, FACIALS a LAP DOG! Before the screen fades black Shady Greg is said to shout "Let's try peanut butter next".

1 comment:

  1. Hey man you can't blame the dude those little Pekinese are sluts!