Monday, October 29, 2012
HOLY GOD! THE UKRAINIANS ARE COMING!
How awesome is this? This past week Ukrainians (ukrainiens?) have been flocking to my blog in droves! I freaking love the Ukrainian people! I myself am like 20% Ukrainian. The other 80% is 100% Irish Awesomeness. Whenever I stub my toe or do something totally gay or stupid, I blame my 20% Ukrainian ass for it. I mean all over the world people tell Polish jokes (even Pollacks tell Polish jokes) but scientific studies involving hand puppets and questionnaires have repeatedly shown Ukrainians can not comprehend hand puppets (unless the hand puppet also makes use of a chalk board, colored chalk and small words). What this proves is not clear except that credit fraud in the Ukraine is probably really easy. Also, we should probably tell more Ukrainian jokes and lay off the Poles for awhile. Aren't the Poles and Ukrainians neighbors? Why don't I ever get any Pollacks visiting my blog? Oh yeah, they're too stupid to know how to turn on a computer. You wouldn't Believe how many Pollacks it Takes to turn on a computer!