SHADY GREG'S STRANGE EATING DISORDER!

The Shady One came back from lunch yesterday with sauce stains all over his shirt and noodles dangling from his ears; not an unusual sight for him. Shady normally returns from lunch with fresh stains decorating his Hawaiin shirts and lederhosen (Shady dresses like a fucking idiot because he is a fucking idiot. I didn't even know Joe Boxer made lederhosen). From Cap'n Crunch to Lobster Bisque, from Mac n Cheese to Animal Crackers; Shady Greg can not eat a meal without wearing half of it. So yesterday I asked him about this. Greg laughed and said " I know. I know. It's strange. I try eating anything with a fork or a spoon and I have no clue where my mouth is. But anytime I'm on my knees, hands cuffed behind my back, blindfold in place, working the Glory Hole at an interstate Truck Stop and NOTHING MISSES MY MOUTH! NOTHING! Strange isn't it?". I reminded myself to never ask Greg questions.