Sunday, December 23, 2012

IS SHADY GREG REALLY THAT FUCKING STUPID?

I get asked all the time if Shady Greg is really as slimy as I paint him to be. Simply put: YES! However, even more often I am asked if Shady is really as flat out fucking stupid as these tales say or , perhaps, I embellish The Shady One's stupidity just a tad. Allow me to state for the record, once and for all, Shady Greg is, unequivocally, THE STUPIDEST PERSON on the entirety of EARTH!!! I understand, especially at this time of the year, that that is not a very charitable thing to say about anyone. To say it about Shady Greg though, I was being charitable! Not only did I refer to him as a person, but I refrained (against my true feelings) from writing "Shady Greg is the STUPIDEST FUCKING IDIOT of a SHITTY STUPID FUCK WAD of a RETARDED FAILED ABORTION to ever walk the planet". Just thinking of Greg's stupidity makes me go all grammatically incorrect and shit. Here at Kitchens and More we have had Christmas music blaring over the sound system since September. Very  Annoying. The annoyance is compounded by Shady walking around singing stupidly and off key: "All I want for Christmas is my two front feet, my two front feet, my two front feet  All I want for Christmas is my two front feet, my two front feet, my two front feet" on and on until I threaten his very existence and he switches to : "Check the halls for dust and dolly" or "Little Bummer Boy". These are not attempts at humor. Shady is just an idiot. He thinks Frosty is a glowman and that Rudolph is a bed hosed rain fear (Shady is borderline illiterate and a FUCKING idiot. Making sense is not a necessity for the brainless). Shady claims to be very religious, yet he thinks Santa (yes, he actually believes in Santa) and Jesus are one in the same (How else could Santa deliver all those presents in one night?).  Kind of puts the TRINITY into new light, doesn't it? The Father, The Son and The Holy Santa? Rudolph then would not be fiction, but Devine Intervention. Seriously, Greg has been known to sit at a stop sign for up to an hour waiting for it to change. All I want for Christmas is my two front feet. Shady Greg REALLY is a Fucking Idiot!

2 comments:

  1. DUDE! Cut the guy some slack. If you had a zombie rooster for a dick you might be a little out of it as well. Of course, he had to be a 'TARD to get a zombie cock in the first place, so maybe he is a fucking idiot. Sorry for quibbling.

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  2. So wait a second, if "two front feet" is incorrect then what the fuck is the lyric?

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