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Thursday, July 26, 2012


Ever since revealing that Shady Greg, a giant DICK, is in fact, dickless, I have been swamped with letters and emails asking if he is transgender or something. The answer is NO! He only seems that way (effeminate, I mean). My readers expressed interest in knowing more about a man (term used loosely) with no bulge. I must clear up this misconception, Shady has several bulges (His ass bulges in odd directions like an obese rhinoceros in cheap Salvation Army slacks.)(Wait, are there skinny rhino's?). There actually is an ever changing bulge in the front of his jeans: allow me to explain. Have you ever seen the Bruce Lee movie Enter the Dragon? You know the Bad Guy-Mr. Han? He is missing his right hand (Mr. Han...hand) so he keeps a collection of screw in hands that he can use whenever he wants like a werewolf hand or a skeleton hand or a long fingered green alien hand; whatever strikes his fancy, right? Well, Shady has a bunch of screw in ... devices, I guess, would be the best way to describe them. Not dildo's or vibrators because Greg only fantasizes sex. He does not participate. No, what Shady screws into the space where his mini elf dick had been, is an impressive array of Inspector Gadget type tools. Literally. Greg has flower snippers, mini-weed whackers, a 9 volt drill driver, jumper cables, lighted magnifying glass, (ironically) a small hose, and he used to have an automated fly swatter but got rid of it because it kept hitting him in his own zipper (it was a FLY swatter!).

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