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Friday, May 18, 2012

THE PLAGUE OF THE BROWN NOSE BEWITCHER!

Shady Greg. Gay Deep Throat John. Brownish Trolls. The Horseless Barbarian. GhostMark.- One would think that those of us here at Kitchens and More have been struck with enough Fist of Freak Force that we deserve a break from the bedlam. But, no. No rest for the wicked or those they surround. We have now added the Brown Nose Bewitcher to our long list of  loathable losers. And if She were not enough to be hit with; She created The Wicked Enchantment of  GhostMark! The Tragic Tale of GhostMark  is far too long to go into here and now, but suffice to say that before the arrival of The Brown Nose Bewitcher, his haunting 'twas but a whisper. The Brown Nosed One arrived quietly, about two months ago, under light of a full moon. She was of fairly normal appearance, weather worn but not shabby, with feet three sizes bigger than her height would suggest. If only we had recognized that omen for what it was! But no. Alas, we of blind eye knew not what we saw (The Bewitching!) and saw nothing out of sort. We were told her name was Deb Orzo (A lie!) and that she was but a transfer from a newly closed store in our chain ( a store closed not because of economy but of Witch Craft?). I say she came quietly. True! But her silence lasted but a minute. At first her nose was normal in look, normal in size; a nose that blended within unremarkableness to go virtually unnoticed. Soon enough tho', the Mark did appear. As manager after manager fell under this She-Devil spell the Mark grew more distinctive. If she did not like a schedule, the schedule was changed. If she wanted to leave work early, she was granted early leave. As this Bewitched Bitchy Beast Boldly Bloodied Bum-managers into submission (which they thanked her for) the Mark filled into its final terrifying form- That of a Bulls Eye, all in brown, engulfing the end of her nose. Using her gigantic feet to propel her inhumanly she then lept o'top the microhoods and shrieked with blood curdling power-"I am the Brown Nose Bewitcher! Beware for I am Queen of the Damned (dumd ass customer) and I now rule this store (except on my days off. I get tired like anyone else). Then she lept to the ground, shook out her Medusa like mane, and ambled (first time I ever saw a chick amble!) over to our manager and said "Rosie sweeeeety. Can I leave early? I tired." Of course she was granted early leave. I must put aside this telling now, but soon I shall share the terrible truth known as The Wicked Enchantment of GhostMark.

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